Lie about the person above you

[Mycernius]

I said I'd do it and I did on the "say something about the person above you" thread.
This one is quite easy, just make up an outragous lie about the person above you. For example
"Mycernius is an aquatic monster from Stingray, whose real purpose is to take over Liechtenstein. Gets tax free status as a world dictator then."

Have fun and let your imagination run wild. As I am first, I am the first victim

[friendly hardline atheist]

Mycernius is Mithras. He is posing here on the forum under an assumed name. He comes from a highly disfunctional family. His father is a jealous, petty, unjust, unforgiving, vindictive, bloodthirsty, misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully. He got angry once for what a bunch of people did, and in his rage he had poor Mycernius nailed to a tree, while Mycernius had nothing to do with it. What a dad!
Mycernius' mom also has issues. She's a bit of a slag, yet likes to pretend she's oh so innocent. While it may be true that Mycernius' dad is not getting any, it doesn't mean Mycernius was born of a virgin. Honestly, who would believe his moms excuses that all her STDs were immaculately transmitted? Come on, really.

[Mycernius]

FHA is really a small yellow rubber duck from the planet Saturn. He has come to earth to make friends with other small yellow rubber ducks for possible longterm relationships. Unfortunately all the good small yellow rubber ducks are either gay or already married, leaving only old ones or blue rubber ducks who are only interested in one night stands.
His mother told him not to come, but your know teenagers and their ideas. His grandfather's turning in his bath.

[friendly hardline atheist]

Hi Mycernius,

Originally Posted by Mycernius

FHA is really a small yellow rubber duck from the planet Saturn.

That's outrageous! I'm not from Saturn, that uncivilised backward gas hole in the outer reaches of our galaxy. I'm from Mars. You can ask any of my collegues, family or ex-girl friends. They have all told me many times over 'You must be from Mars, you idiot!'.

And some of my fellow rubber duckies didn't like the suggestion that we come from Saturn. They got really upset and hired some Vogon mercenaries to go after you. You may soon expect to be beamed off the planet and meet a pretty horrible fate. That will teach you.

Peter

Ok, I'll give it a go! *L*

FHA is ACTUALLY a Bible-thumping born-again Christian incognito! Yes, sir, every Sunday morning, Sunday evening and Wednesday nights he's glued to a pew at his local church. He's secretly working on getting phone numbers and addresses of all the (real) atheists in the world together so that the Fundie Mafia can eventually herd them all into a ghetto in eastern France and have God rain frogs on them daily until they repent. *LOL*

[Mycernius]

NCAngelfire works for a sercret organisation that is so amazingly sercret that it doesn't even have a name. The only way you know of its existance is that every now and then NCAngelfire gives the secret word, which is Gribbledonk, all members recite the laws of thermodynamics and repaint lamposts.

Mycernius' real name is Hunaman because he was born with a vestige tail. He hasn't ever felt badly about it though--as a matter of FACT, he became most popular in high school as the center of haute fashion by bedecking it with rhinestones of various colours. Everyone wanted one!!!

[Mycernius]

As I recall you wanted one as well.
NCAngelFire is jealous of vestige tails as members of her species have never had them. Instead they can only wear rhinestone fakes on their freakishly long noses and eyelashes. Rhinestone are very rare where she comes from.

Oh I DID want one! I even remember one of your wives taunting me back then about it! How is she, anyway? I heard she had done volunteer work for Mitt Romney before his campaign went under. That was mighty good of you to let her out of the compound for a bit to help him, although it probably put a strain on the other wives keeping up with the routine around the house and all.

[friendly hardline atheist]

NCAngelFire is an activist of the radical Left. She converted to a (sometimes violent) fringe form of Marxism at the age of 11. She is presently engaged in a smearing campaign against religious conservatives in the US. She has been responsible for making the press focus on the morality and intelligence of various high-profile political figures of the religious right. The effects have been devastating to them. Her most important victim has been president George W. Bush. She has attempted to make the president look dim-witted by letting the media repeatedly send out the more unfortunate footage of his speaking errors. She has proven to be a remarkably effective operator. She's the most dangerous woman involved in the US political scene after Hillary Clinton, but like Hillary Clinton and Fidel Castro, she has proven impervious to CIA assassination plots. The CIA has thus far been unsuccessful because they have not yet figured out her great weakness: chocolate.